If you are able to attack a battle (with Sieges, every player who is not the protector can do so, though this may differ with other battle subtypes), you can attack with your creatures , or use direct-damage spells that allow you to either target a battle specifically, or merely say any target
You also want to make sure your opening hand has ramp
Yokai - Enigmatic Inventor makes full use of this ink strength by allowing players to return an item to their hand and then pay two less ink to play another item whenever Yokai quests
It's got hands, and it's standing in the middle of some ruins, so maybe it's an abandoned statue holy ****, thats Kozilek
Im led to believe that this is a Columbo reference, but having never seen it, all I can say is that its about as subtle as your friend trying to go off and win in your end step after dropping this moustachioed menace into play